Such a shock. She is only 64, so full of life and energy. Stronger and more energetic than me. Just got diagnosed, it is stage 4 pancreatic cancer. The woman who is the heart of our family does not have long to live. I'm devastated. I'm one of those very lucky people who have such a warm, caring and fun relationship with my mom. She had me when she was only 20, I thought maybe we'd be old ladies together. We're in touch every day. She lives across the country. I'm flying back and forth to be there for her. My 9 year old and husband just spent two weeks without me so I could be there with my mom.
Flying is so rough on me. I don't mean to complain. Just look at what my mom is going through! But the flying and the caring for my mom (lots of stairs in her house) it is really tiring. I just keep saying it will make me stronger and I've been meaning to work out more so here it is, the ultimate work out, caring for someone you love.
Trying to plan and work out how we will manage this, like, do I move back home and bring my daughter with me, enroll her in school there for the year?
I'm just here letting it all out because I'm so sad. And I'm worried that I'll start to flare in the Fall and get worse in the winter, which has so far been my thing over the last few years. I just want to be there for her. She has been so incredibly caring and helpful for me, especially when I got dx with uveitis and then gluten sensitivity and finally spodylitis. She was always cooking or baking for me, or trying to help me in so many ways, and I was always so appreciative, and loved to give that caring right back to her.
It is just really sad.
Thanks for listening.
