Kickas.org Forums Ankylosing Spondylitis General Discussion #1 AS Web Support Group Newbie with Fused SI plus pain and tiredness

I hope that over all you feel better soon!!!!! Stay strong and rock it!!!!

Cubsglrlfan

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just so tired. feeling down. quite depressed actually. stopped by the college and asked how I can get my registration money refunded. I can't get a student loan, can't find a job which does NOT involve standing for long periods of time, lifting stuff or excessive bending. Simply pitiful. I am disabled! I am stuck in a really tough place. Unable to afford to go back to school nor does it really makes sense to spend so much money chasing a dream if I can't physically work. Too young to retire and too young for pension. What is left now? Thank you for everyone's kind suggestions and words, they are all appreciated.

At least you finally have a Dx. have you looked into some of the work at home sites? Some are scams, but there are some good ones out there, you just have to investigate carefully. I just hope that they can treat your AS without messing up your allergies. Just having a name for the monster gives you some peace of mind, it sure did for me.

newnormalcharity said something the other day that really struck a chord with me:

yes, at first it can all be very overwhelming (and for me personally, every really bad flare feels exactly the same way), but with time, we find our "new normal".

i know it can be a challenge when you have depression to contend with as well. but i hope between your doctor for that, your rheumy, and everyone else, that they can help you manage your AS, to the point that you are feeling better, both physically and emotionally.

just be kind to yourself right now and don't try to figure out to much. just wait til you are feeling better to worry about the whole job thing. once you are feeling more optimistic, i'm sure you'll figure something out, you're a very creative woman from what i've seen

It is not that! It is that I am completely alone dealing with this. My doctor is gone enjoying his holidays. My husband is on holidays. Just me and the fish. One big happy glub, glub family. I am trying so very hard to beat this depression down with an ugly stick; It still attacks me and makes me cry in front of my computer.

Tomorrow I go to the physio dude who will cause a lot of pain. My left SI is killing me. Swollen feeling. It cracks every time I stand up or stretch my leg. The other one is completely silent. It is the silent one which causes me the most pain. It is my right leg which always spasms and cramps badly on me.

Been researching scientific papers to see if I can find a solution for a fused joint. How to encourage the body to stop using calcium to repair a spinal 'hurt' spot. I have found low iron IS directly related to fusion. Going to use my IQ for some good.

I think xrays can be read differently by different radiologists. (The films don't lie.) Depending on the size of the department/hospital/clinic, the radiologist may have a wide variety of types of films he reads. Larger ones may have a slight bit of specialization. I know when I look at my mammogram reports, it's nearly always the name of the same radiologist each year. On other studies, I see the same thing. If they are reading similar types (like orthopedic), it might be more accurate than someone who reads everything because he's one of 2-3 radiologists in a small hospital/clinic. My stuff goes to a hospital radiology department in a 700+ bed hospital.

If that wasn't what you were questioning, let me know. Are you questioning the SIJ films? What did the Arthritis Society say that confused you?

Magic, knowing that you have some ups and downs with your depression, remember this when you get the urge to stop school because it's rough going at times. Wait a few days and see if your outlook is a bit more positive. Maybe jot down in a journal what you are feeling and check in a few days to see if you are still feeling the same. If you are thinking along the same lines for a while, then it may be time to act on it. Hugs to you. You are dealing with a lot of stressors at this time. Take your time, sweetie.