Kickas.org Forums Ankylosing Spondylitis General Discussion #1 AS Web Support Group an update from Kat (non-AS)

My heart goes out to her and her partner.
Hugs,

I think that's a great idea Kat. Go public and let the country see what's really happening behind the scenes.

hello again kat,

just wanted to let you know how much you are on my mind.

i too wish the same things that gilth verbalized.

but really the system has to be changed. so maybe some of the other suggestions people have made about going public with it. the only way things change is if people fight for the change.

from everything i know about you, and seeing all your sweetie has already gone through already, i know you two are very strong people. maybe just the people to figure out a way to gather the support necessary to see change effected.

i'm so very sorry that the two of you have to be a part of this.

and very angry at such a system.

as you said, when processes are put into place to right previous wrongs, it needs to be done in a balanced way, and not in such a way as to swing the other way.

i think more than anything, i really don't know what to say, suggest, do. but i want you to know i'm here for you and thinking of you, like so many others.

Im SO not getting this...UGG!

Brian has all the medical records, scripts, Drs to prove that he has gone thru all of this stuff with his health the hospital stays ect..you can not make that stuff up..Im just so pissed right now I cant even think straight!

They don't want to hear it, Lisa. I guess that back when it all started, when he couldn't pay a lawyer consistently and was only getting inadequate legal counsel, then no actual lawyer because he had no more money, he made some mistakes, and it pissed them off. Now, they're getting payback. It's all I can think.

I'm just trying to keep him from not givin gup altogether right now. He's inconsolable. So am I. I'm trying to get a bunch of our friends together tomorrow to brainstorm.

Hello Kat,

Sorry to hear the news. I was surprised someone could be sent to prison for this... praying somehow can find something that works out.

Tim

Just doing some quick searching/reading on the net and was amazed to find out how much enforcement power the Ontario Family Responsibility Office has. FRO Facts page
It actually says that if your employment or regular income ends, that you still have to make all support payments. I can see how so many could easily get in arrears in this economy. How many men are they going to send to jail - how can any man make money for payments from jail! It is insane.

I also found the Federal Guidelines (which are apparently non-binding ), and entitlement aside, the amount and duration he was given don't seem to reflect the guidelines in any way shape or form, from the little I can tell.
Federal Spousal Support Advisory Guidelines -- PDF file

Kat, was she 62 or older? If not, then the duration of the support he owed should have only have lasted for 3 yrs max.

It really burns me that they basically force non-married people without children into a financially dependent relationship for life.

If he is not allowed to appeal the final appeal - can he put in to ask for a new variance just to have it looked at again?

Mig, thanks for looking into it. No the provinces don't have to follow the federal guidelines, hell they don't even have to follow their own guidelines in Ontario. No she wasn't over the age of 62 - early/mid 50s when they split. She should only have been eligible for 18 months support max.

Yes, he can put in for another motion to vary ... BUT ... he has to ask permission of the Barrie court to do it. Of course, they'll say no because they've decided that he's only trying to delay things. March 2 was supposed to be to hear his motion to vary. He was supposed to have 2 hours for his motion and she was to have 1 hour for her motion to strike his pleadings again. That's what the previous judge ordered. Instead the judge on the day only heard her motion. Told my sweetie's lawyer to sit down and shut up, basically, even tho he had valid legal arguments to make and it went against the rules. She turned down an offer of $150,000 last October, Mig. We didn't knwo where the money was going to come from but at least it would have freed everyone from this hell, and everyone had signed off on it. The court approved it. She said no. In her endorsement the judge flat out says she's recommended it but she cannot force the ex to sign.

We. Have. No. Legal. Recourse. We need help, but have nowhere to turn.

Check your email, OK?

Warm hugs,

I can think of one possible option to swing things in both of your favours. You are Canadian so you must be very familiar with the Fifth Estate? Well they will take a practiced look at your situation and approach the lawyers, etc. involved. Perhaps they would be able to help out?

Here is the contact web page for the Fifth Estate:
http://www.cbc.ca/fifth/content/contact/

http://www.cbc.ca/fifth/content/about/howwework.html

Good luck. A very tough situation which I truly hopes works out in your favour.
Angie

best wishes x