I just started the MTX yesterday evening.. Obvioulsy, it will be a while before it starts to work. My rheumy said a week to two or three weeks.. The pamphlet from the pharmacy said up to months... Aye.. (anybody have any experience with this drug?)
Last night was one of those nights that I haven't experienced in a couple months. I couldn't find a comfortable position, did the pillow between the legs, popped a couple vicodin and prayed to for sleep to relieve me for a few hours...
I wrote a few weeks ago about my right hip going numb when I lay on it and a few said that it was the tissue response to the inflammation.. Made sense.. Now it's pretty much numb all the time. I fell a sleep with a tube of chapstick in my pocket last night and apparently it snaked its way up just enough, best I can figure and lodged itself right in that sweet spot on my hip.. I went to role over and experienced such a sharp, burning pain I literally screamed... It felt like someone was trying to brand me! And I don't scream.. I mean.. You have to dangle me off the side of a cliff and threaten to let go before I'll scream... My poor boyfriend hit the ceiling.. We didn't know what to make of it..
Thwarted by a tube of chapstick... Oh boy.. Such good stories to tell the grandkids... If we have any.. Boyfriend says, kids? we can't have kids! You can't support your own weight.. Think of having a belly.. And carrying the kids and chasing them around..
He thinks kids are a bad idea.. Not that I want a kid anytime soon (like, in the next five years), I got an IUD for a reason.. And now the MTX, as I understand it, is so potent, I have to stop it 6 months before I 'plan' to become pregnant.. Oy..
Alright, well.. I'm going to go lay down for a little while longer.. Despite how exhausted I am, I only got about three hours of sleep last night.. Nothing much to do but sit around the house.. It's been raining since late Thursday night.
I want a sunny day at the beach, with my dog and my old weight (so I can wear that two piece I finally got the guts to buy last year) and a picnic and a beer and a frisbee... I want to be normal again, for one day.....
