Hi there, yah, the mutable nature of AS pain is definitely not easy to keep up with. I think of AS as the Bits & Bites of the arthritis world. A whole new day (handful) a whole new pain (taste) sensation. Every time I think that, I see the commercial for Bits & Bites and it puts a small smile on my face. That helps me to minimize the pain in a way. If I can smile or laugh about it, it doesn't have control. One of the things I love about this place is the way discussions go silly at the drop of a hat. SteveC's philosophy of laughter got me started on this route.
The others have made some very good points. It is about acceptance, but not about succumbing to the pain. Accept that the pain and AS are a part of your life now, but recognize that they are not all you are. You are so much more than this, we all are, but it's easy to lose sight of that. Acceptance is also about personal growth. So many of us, I think, become more aware of other people due to the fact that we live with a potentially debilitating disease and that helps us be compassionate towards other people. It also helps us become more compassionate toward ourselves.
I know what you mean about the hypochondria thing. Try keeping a journal that includes: pain levels, pain locations, weather, what you ate, physical activity (not just exercise based, but also what you did that day), your emotions, new treatments you're learning about, your current treatment plan, questions for your doctor's appointments. It will really help you gain a better understanding of your particular version of AS, as well as helping you keep track of pain/inflammation triggers and things to talk about with your doctors. It will also help to get negative thoughts out of your brain so they don't fester there. If you can read them, it can become easier to be a bit more objective.
And keep coming here. These are some of the best folk anywhere.
Hugs,
