Kickas.org Forums Ankylosing Spondylitis General Discussion #1 AS Web Support Group They are taking Eric away again

Hey again everyone,
I didn't think I would be posting again so quickly, but I just needed to get this out. UUUUUG!
I have posted here a few times over the past few years in regards to Eric's ex wife and everything she has put us through over the past 12 years and is still putting us through. It's gotten worse since she decided to try to take our house away. I have posted some of this in the woman's forum, and I have discussed it via PM with our friendly KA attorney Steve, but today I said to heck with it. I am just letting it all hang out and posting here in the main forum.


We have spent so many years trying to prove we don't owe her any money, but the court won't listen to us even though we have receipts (not all, but most) and statements showing that as of 1995 we had a 0 balance.
Here we've been thinking since that we've been making our regular child support payments faithfully, but they are saying all those payments were going towards back arears, and of course we're going to end up owing alot since we were being charge $400. a month interest. Isn't that the craziest thing ever?! Especially since didn't owe anything in the first place?
We've been trying to get someone to listen, but we aren't getting anywhere and now they are making us sell our house.
Eric went back to court today and because he couldn't prove that the house was put up for sale yet, he now has to spend until Thanksgiving in jail.
UUUG! What sense does that make even if we did owe the money, which we DON'T!
I have always been proud of myself not having any gray hair yet, but I think that's going to change soon. I always felt it wasn't how bad a problem was that caused gray hair, but how you dealt with the problem, but I don't think I am going to be able to keep dealing with all this in a calm manner anymore, unless of course I take some valium, but I don't want to be a zombie either, or do I? LOL JK

I know there are alot of dead beat dads out there, but alot of them don't even deserve this kind of treatment. Then you have someone like Eric who is a huge part of his kids life and is doing everything by the book, but has a greedy, sneaky ex who has cheated the welfare system so she could get double the money and marries into money, driving around in a lexus SUV, lives in a $500,000 house and then goes into the courts and cries she has nothing, when the kids don't even live with her anymore and the courts still sticks it to the ex-husband as bad as they can then something is definitely wrong with the system and I think I know what it's called, but I shouldn't say it here. Although right now I am sick and tired of it all that I shouldn't care!!!!
Here's all the faces I have made since 3:00 this afternoon...

and not all in that order.

I called the attorney at the disability law unit to let her know what happened today and although she can't help me, she did give me a few ideas, like not signing any papers and writing a letter to the judge explaining why. Only thing is...the longer I go without signing, the worse it ends up for Eric and I don't want to see him in jail for a long time either. It's bad enough that this time in jail from now until Thanksgiving is really going to hurt us paying bills this month and xmas is going to be tougher. Guess it's time to start searching the house for things to sell huh?

I think I am sad more then mad even though I know I should be boiling at this point, but I think I've gone past that stage. Now I am just sad, because I know I can't live without my dogs and finding another home that allows dogs is really hard, unless of course we can buy again in time, but I doubt we'll have enough left over.
My dogs are my life! Besides my husband and kids of course, but they are old enough to fend for themsleves. Whereas, the dogs are older and with Bogart being sick...he needs me! I need him!

Ok, on a different note...I got new pictures of my grandsons on Colorado. YAAAAAA!
These are Brian's two sons. Carter will be two in June and Aiden just turned one the first of this month.
These pictures couldn't have come at a more perfect time. Surely made me smile! I couldn't wait to share them with you.
Ok, I am feeling really tired and think I may shut down the PC and write a little letter to Brian. I can't tell him what is happening with Eric though. There is no reason for him to know. He has enough to contend with there. As long as he comes home safely anybody can have whatever they want!
Thanks for letting me vent and share everyone.
I hope everyone is doing ok.
Luv ya guys!
Hugs,
Lisa

Hey Lisa,
Sounds like you have a battle on your hands. I know where you are coming from when it comes to fighting the system, been there, done that, got the t-shirt. I wish I had the magic answer to why the courts se things the way they do, but I don't. We will keep you and yours in our prayers, and hope that things straighten out without you losing your home.

Keep Kickin'AS
Chris

Hi Lisa,

First off, the kids are adorable. What a blessing.

Secondly, while reading your post, I immediately thought you should have an accountant go through all the financials and organize everything so that a judge can see what you have paid and when you paid it. Your attorney should be able to recommend someone experienced in divorce/child support cases.

Wishing you the best,
Jessie

Lisa,

I am just at a loss as what to say!!!!

I thought Bill and I dealt with satan in his X, but I think your husband's X might have reached an all new low.

It was always "drama" when we were dealing with Sharon. We always paid the "child support" and I know about that living beyond your means and then coming back and trying to stick it to you again.

Our biggest problem was she always used Rachel as the "pawn" it hurt Bill and she knew it hurt Bill...that made me want to hurt her.

Even now that Rachel is 21 and "thank god" we haven't had to deal with her directly for 3 years now, she still reaks havoc where ever she goes.

4 years ago when her "then" husband had an affair on her she decided to abandon Rachel and her other son Mark ,was was only 12 at the time and become a stewardess so now she flies 3 out of the 4 weeks and has someone else raising her son (not his dad) poor Mark has been kicked out of school, and starting to get into trouble.

Now the biggie is Rachel called us and said her mother is kicking her and Ava out of the house. This makes SO much sense since Sharon is only home for a week a month. So now Rachel has to uproot Ava and find them both a place to live.

That sad thing is it will really never end. Every time she hurts Rachel and Ava it hurts us.

I dont know what else to say except I am sorry, I cant believe they think putting him in jail is actually going to help the situation.

I guess what I really can't believe is that there isnt someone that can help you.

PM me if you want to talk, we can trade horror stories..lol I am being serious surely there is something someone can do.

I will be talking to you,

Lisa

Lisa,
I so wish I had all the right words to make everything better, but I have nothing . I'm just sooooo sorry that this Ex is causing such trouble for you and your family. There needs to be some island in the middle of the ocean were bad Ex's can be sent so they can make each other miserable .
But I do have to say those are some of the cutest kids, darn near as cute as mine

Big hugs to you
Debora

Sorry to hear the bad news Lisa. Working in accounting and overseeing payroll, I know how difficult it can be to deal with federal agencies with child support... lots of red tape and not well managed. That opens the system to abuse.

Praying for the best for you in resolving answers... having to sell the house seems like an extreme in my opinion.

Tim

Well this whole thing totally sucks !!
I hope there is a good turn of events for you soon

Maggie

Wow! Why are they making you sell the house? Are you not on the deed? You don't have an interest in the house? This is just plain crazy!

Sorry to hear that all this is happening. Hopefully things will get resolved.

Take care,
Cara

Hi Lisa

I so know what you and your son Eric are going through.

My husband's ex-wife put us through living h$ll. She even went as far to allege false accusations. All was proven unfounded. For many years she kept the children from visiting with their father. The judge seen this. He also took note of the fact my DH wasn't making very much money. He told my DH that he didn't have to pay support. For five years we had been tangled up in the court system.

DH never missed telling his son and daughter, at Christmas, any special occasion, or when he just wanted to talk to them, how much he loved them. They are now in there 20s and now are very close with their father.

Can we forgive his ex-wife, I believe we have, we will just never forget and always will be on guard.

I am hoping the judge will see what your son's ex-wife is all about, and will side with your son. Getting all financial records together will help towards making everthing right for your son.

I love the pictures of your handsome grandsons.

Hugs

Gerri