Kickas.org Forums Ankylosing Spondylitis General Discussion Helpful Tips Some thoughts on Depression

I was just reading some posts discussing the D-word...depression. I wanted to share something that I have found very helpful. I cycle in and out of depression approximately 4 times per year and each episode doesn't last that long. Perhaps due to the frequency of episodes I am starting to recognize when I am falling into that dark place. I am starting to be able to sort of step back and look at myself and my surroundings. (sort of an out of body experience, only not as cool) and I say things out loud to myself like, "Ok, you're crying and there really isn't anything all that wrong, you're avoiding phone calls, visitors and going out with the family (things I usually love)...It's official, you're depressed."

And then the most important thing I do is that I go and tell another adult, usually my husband. I specifically say that I am depressed, I don't want anything special from him, (okay, maybe a hug) and I just need him to know that "I know" and that it's not a big deal, it will pass.

For me, this openess about it minimalizes the impact. I would so much rather lay it all out on the table like that than hold it in and have my hubby feel like he has to walk on eggshells around "the crazy lady." I also notice that when I acknowledge to myself what is going on, the depression fades faster.

Hopefully any of this made sense.

Love you all and thanks for being here with me as we struggle and learn to live with, and sometimes inspite of, this disease.

-Donette

Good for you. I've worked hard to be open about my depression too, including at work where I want to normalize it and remove the shame people with mental illness suffer from.

I'm currently doing well, and have done for a few years, but I've been on anti-depressants for about six years now and don't believe that now is the time to try to come off them. Think I'll wait until I have my pain levels more under control. I'm a great believer in treating mental health in the same way we treat physical health.

Hey D...
Yeah its a doozey that one.... but glad to hear you look at it objectively, and rationally. Step back, clock it and know that it'll pass. Just don't tell the doc too much or they'll throw an SSRI script at you... (and ya know how i feel about those things).. I did some Cog behavioural stuff which is really helpful/the best for depr. anx. and life in general.... my favourite 'tool' is to take the mickey out of my negative self... when i start goin hoooo hummmm booo hooo.. just say to myself eg...'oh really? shut up.. get over it you doofus!...' it takes a bit of practice but gets habitual....otherthing that is awesome is a big walk or swim... when thee old bones permit that is.... 4 times a year sounds quite like seasonal changes are getting to you maybe ?..... anyways chin up D... goodvibes to ya....
Rob (((0)))

I think Rob is spot on in that anything you can effectively do (cog behavior therapy, etc.) to avoid additional meds is the way to go. I also read this article recently which I found quite interesting.

The placebo problem Big Pharma's desperate to solve

Hi,
Depression is quite common to AS patients. I am also finding difficult to completely overcome that. Whenever I feel better, I do not find that effect.

Regards
Jay

Hey Wendy, good point. They say if you're depressed then pain hurts worse, so I agree with you that when your pain is high would be a bad time to go off anti-depressants.

I've tried several over the years, the most recent was wellbutrin, this one worked really good for me and was easy to stop taking. They are all so different though, and I really think quitting them should be closely monitored by a doc.

Thanks for your words.

Hey Rob,

I agree totally about the swim or walk, fresh air is soooo good for my mind. Seasonal depression, I haven't ever thought of it that way, but that just might be right. I'll have to start paying closer attention to when it strikes. I have always thought it was a raging case of PMS! Just what you wanted to hear, right?? Ha ha. Take Care, and thanks for the good vibes.

-D

Hi Donette,
Wellbutrin is one of mine. I take two - I started with celexa but had to take quite high doses before it was effective. I had been severely depressed for a long time before that - at least two years - and the psychiatrist felt that my serotonin levels were very depleted, hence the need for such high doses of celexa before I started to improve. The trouble was, at that level, celexa made me dozey, so we added in wellbutrin and lowered the dose of celexa. The combo of the two was and is excellent. Now I'm on incredibly low doses of both for ongoing maintenance, although if I can stabilize my RA I will try coming off them again.

Jaybird,

That article on placebo effect blows my mind!! That is so awesome. Who knew the power of our own brain!!

Hi Jay,
That makes sense to me, especially when coming off a bad flare, it stands to reason we would feel better all over, even mentally. Thanks for your input.