Hello Infammator,
I have been were you are at... never would have thought I would ever have gotten to that point, but I did.
I had to get help and check in at hospital. I was in lock down for several days and got medication for the depression. Much like you I hung on for religious and family reasons.
Thankfully I found answers for my personal AS and doing much better and never have returned to that dark time.
Pray you can find answers and help as well. If you need, continue to post here... through the years have seen many posting similar to you. Life is not always easy, we need to take one day at a time.
Take care,
Tim
