Hi Loz,

It's weird to think that the old KA site is out there floating in cyberland, currently innacessible?? Weirder still to think that it can be made obtainable again...??!!!

Hey, whilst I'm certainly not a techno-babe, I'm not a puter-doofus either - and I'm more than willing to accept that those here who do know about these things, will make them happen if they have the knowledge and determination to do so.

Do I have to read everything under the sun, the sky, anything out there in the known universe to know this and to trust this process?? No - of course I don't!!! And an even bigger NO to the pseudo-troll who wants the thorough investigation of the UNknown universe before this whole process can even proceed....*sigh*

Hey Loz - one interesting feature I noted on the old site (and a nursing forum I frequent) is being able to set up a poll. Think it would be interesting one for this post:

(a) who got the NSD analogy?

(b) or did you just hear a great big *whoosing* noise??

The two NSD sub-groups HAHAHAHA!!!!! (Ok, now I know it's time to stop...I know my SOH is on the darker side of black and not everybody gets it...well, apart from other nurses and medical staff)


Hey, think you might be onto a winner about the ten fingers, one mouth thing....or is that just wishful thinking??

I know I lost it earlier this year, because it was so unlike "me" - normally I am Ms. Cool, Calm and Collected and I am frequently described as being "serene", but that has been far from what I have felt in the last year. At one point (my bad point on here) I frequently felt as if my head was going to implode.

As I said, this has been my worst year by far, and even if it had been my very best, my BS filter would still be finely attuned, and instead it has been MEGA-attuned - well, for the most part! (I actually wish I'd taken more notice of it at times!)

Knowing that I'm just about to embrace (haha) the very worst of my issues concerns me as whilst I know that it's kind of inevitable I will feel increased stress, what I really dread is feeling that *imploding* feeling again. Both issues have the potential to drag on, which doesn't help, but knowing one will be easily more rapid than the other does. *Phew!*

Ahhh, Loz....just want to get feeling like ME again.......*sigh*

And hopefully earnest posters (supreme 'giving the benefit of the doubt' here) like Wally won't set my usually-sensitive-anyway-BS filter off, and get me wound "up a height" as they say in some places in the NE... and of course, I am better prepared this time, notjust for my reactions, but my reasons for them (which is the important bit)

Thank you for wishing me well and for your kind words, Loz.

Hope your visit to Loros goes well, I'm sure you'll get a lot of comfort from it.

Today has been the first day of the "Light for Life" of the Hospice here, I'd wanted to go to the ceremony but ended up stuck at work. Although I was upset at first, I knew that being there wasn't what mattered, it was what was in my heart and soul that counted...like for most of life's *events*...

Take care Loz,

Jan


If my life is for rent and I don't learn to buy

Well I deserve nothing more than I get

'Cos nothing I have is truly mine

- Dido