Hi Kat,
Oh hon, this is just horrible. I'm too darn tired to offer any real coherent thoughts right now (recovering well from my pneumonia, but still tired all the time and sleeping more than normal), so all I can really add here is that I am SO sorry to hear how this is ripping your family apart and SO sorry that your sister finds herself in this awful position. Yes, she seems to be defending him now, but from the way you've described this, it's easy to tell that she is a totally innocent victim in all this who is being manipulated by this man because she still can't make herself love him any less (all, as you said, because she thinks she can save him, I'm sure). Before I married my ex, I had almost zero exposure to the mental health systems in Michigan and Ontario, so when she started having some very bad problems, I went through some of the same shock and dismay you are going through as I saw more and more of these facilities from the inside and as I learned what the laws would and would not allow me to do. All I can say is that with the exception of two hospitals--one in Michigan and one in Chatham--everything I saw having to do with mental health at the hospital level was a disgrace, period. At a time when your family is desperate to find someone who is willing to help you and your sister, I have no doubt that you feel as if you were running into one brick wall after another.
I might have a few ideas of things you can do that might help your sister see things more clearly, or might help with the courts if you are seeking injunctions or restraining orders against him at some point, but I just can't bring my thoughts together in a coherent enough manner right now to discuss them. After I get some sleep, I will come back here and add some additional thoughts Kat, I promise. Until then, all I can add is that you and your family, especially your sister and her girls, are very much in my thoughts and prayers today.
Know that everyone here loves you very much and that we are here to support you in any way we can. Many of us are within a few hours of you in Toronto, Kat, so don't hesitate to call out for help if there is anything we can do.
Brad
